PLAY-ing for Patience

This post I wrote for Parentous , I really like.

I had a feeling that I was being original this time.

So read the post.here. or below.



I’m in a very tricky parenting phase right now. My little boy is discovering new territories to explore, where he insists on cooking his own meals and wants to try on every other shoe in the cupboard or simply loves slapping our faces; thereby managing to challenge my limits of patience every single day.
Now, the very parents who brought me up by not sparing the rod lest they spoil the child, cannot bear it if I ever even once raise my voice at my baby. (Make no mistake, that’s exactly how grandparents work). And you on the other hand are constantly left feeling guilty ( Make no mistake, that’s exactly how motherhood also works)
Making his own meal
Since the day he was born I have been consistently trying to fix myself and get my act together as a parent. Raising my bar of tolerance has been the hardest of it all only next to being sleep deprived, of course. I hate being ‘disrespected’ and to make someone who is not even two years old understand this, is not child’s play ( for the lack of a better word).
I have had a few “well done, mommy” moments, but then there is also the burden of the ‘Mom-ster’ moments where you lose your cool with your child, who was just being himself and was only doing what is perhaps very significant and fascinating to his tiny world – like peeing into his own hands to see it splash off in another tangent. Now you see, why I tend to lose it?
mischiefmanaged 2
I have referred to almost every blog and article on respectful parenting, and how to be more careful NOT to explode?
And they all asked me to:
Lower my tone ( Yeah right! Like that’s going to work when he’s pissing on your dining table. A loud HEY! is definitely going to come out of me as a reflex)
Pick my battles ( I really don’t get this! Some days it just doesn’t work. Some days I don’t mind him spitting an entire meal on me. And some days you can find me threatening him for squashing a tiny cockroach. I’m a bad chooser, I guess)

Give myself a timeout –
 ( As much as I would looooove to take one, this has only upset my little one more. He would rather take a pinch on his bum than have me locked up in a room) See, I really DO want to BE THE ADULT here at all times, but I found this exercise very trying and it left me exhausted and disappointed. This was for really advanced, highly evolved human beings and honestly, I’m not there yet!
I kept wondering what could be a more relaxing way to let my steam out and eventually I came up with a couple of creative ways that my toddler also approves. So here are a few methods to avoid yelling at your kids that are working for me and maybe it works for you too.
Play London London Statue – Get your toddler to play this game with you. And whenever you catch him at a naughty act say “statue”. That should freeze him and your temper for a good few seconds. I ask mine to fold his hands, and with a reminder every ten seconds, he manages to sit still, while I clear the shards of my coffee mug.
Sing -a- song – Today, most parents know that shouting doesn’t help and that your message gets drowned in your noise. In such situations, I have found it more refreshing to turn my message into a song or his favourite rhyme. Songs turn the moment lighter instantly. So I sing “Down will fall high chair and baby and all” (to the tune of Rock -a-bye-baby), when he climbs on the high chair table to get a better view of the food being served.
Click a picture – This was a miracle find and it worked really well for me. If I’m sure he’s just being naughty and not in a place where he might get harmed, then I remind myself to stop and click a picture of the ‘#mischiefmanaged’ and post it on Instagram. And by the time I’m done, my rush of anger has disappeared. Just like that. It’s more creative than counting to ten, don’t you think?
mischiefmanaged
Some days have been really rewarding and it has helped me be peaceful and him, confident. And I really do hope that with more practice I might get to a place where I can enjoy not just this but every growing phase of parenthood. Do you Mammas have anymore fun and play-along ways that I can try?

And I'm working on it everyday-  on my Patience. I hope my baby grows to appreciate that I'm trying. And bringing all of my best to be a good mother.


Debunking a few Parenting Myths

I wrote this in a hurry for Parentous.com.

But I think my friends on Facebook really did enjoy the read.

So here goes the link or read it below.


I have always felt that birthing and parenting were way easier than stomaching some of the advice that came my way after. Most of them were well-meant pieces of advice by close relatives, but some were outright hilarious. Here are a few I got to hear when I started my journey into motherhood.
Pregnant ladies, I am glad to give you a peek into what you might have to endure. Thank me later, Okay?
1. Do not buy any baby stuff before the baby is born, its bad luck.
My baby looked like an inflated balloon the night he was born, in a pair of over sized pyjamas, which only fit him well now, at the age of 20 months.
Truth: Have some faith in God and make sure you have every single thing in the list the hospital gave you, including diapers, baby clothes, and swaddlers.Your luck is not going to change because you bought your baby some essentials. It can instead save you some frantic running to the nearby store on the birth night/ day.
motherhood myths debunked
2. Do not sleep during the day while pregnant; the baby will become lazy.
Whoever formulated this one must have been unable of bearing the sight of a well rested woman.
Truth: Sleep all you want, ladies! You are not going to be getting much of it anywhere in the near future. And also babies are incapable of being lazy. They have to feed, poop, cry and sleep and are very busy acclimatizing to the world out of the womb. The last thing on their mind is being lazy .
3. Babies born in the night will be sleepless.
Born in the night or day , most babies under two months cannot sleep at night. They will wake up frequently for feeds, for a change of diaper or just because they want to be held.
Truth: Do prepare yourself to be sleep deprived. Catch up on every bit of rest you can; unless you want to turn into a Mom-bie!
4. Don’t spoil your baby by picking him up every time. Also crying helps lung development.
NO! It does not! Also, your baby is too young to have such adult motives.They have no other means to communicate with you but cry. And so they shall!
Truth: Any baby below four months of age will have few self soothing strategies. And will seek your help to calm down . Kindly help the baby and do not let it cry it out. I for one am a total believer that babies who are given that sense of security develop into better and confident kids.
5. Baby BOYS shouldn’t be allowed to cry.
Of all the tales I heard , this was by far the most atrocious yet hilarious one. Apparently too much crying in baby boys leads to the shrinking up of their…you know…little thing!??!!
I swear, I searched all over the internet and couldn’t find anything on this.
Truth: Laugh it off, really hard on their face if someone ever says this to you! It’s a baby that needs some attention. Give all the attention it wants and make no difference be it a boy or a girl.
So Mommies, what were some of the funny tales you got to hear? Or are there any more myths that got debunked as you grew into motherhood?

Meanwhile, I have been in a very meditative mood!. Always contemplating , planning, thinking and not doing anything. And in a way to NOT have the pressure to do something is very relaxing and liberating.  I just found a quote on a  random 30day challenge blog , that said " DO LESS, BE MORE" . And that suddenly made a lot of sense ! And I can tell you its helping!. Its less stressful when one cares less!

What was I even thinking all these years!